Posted on: October 28, 2021 Posted by: vufc2 Comments: 0

By Walt Walton

My heart is heavy and I don’t know exactly how to deal with this grief

I can’t even find the words to encourage my wife, when I speak

Heard the words no heartbeat and I’m in disbelief, asking the Lord why did this have to happen to me?

Alternatively hope nobody else has to deal with this pain

I’m spiritually, physically, and emotionally strained

I’m so inconsistent, my is soul conflicted

Fighting off all these emotions, skipping all my early morning devotions

I get around friends they assume that I’m happy, I just try to pretend

Haven’t read my bible in a while even though I know, it’s what the spirit recommends

Tried praying to God but felt like a fraud, because by this time I’m drowning in sin

I’ll always remember the year of 2019 in September, we lost a set of twins

Then in February another baby added to the obituary, we lost another kid again

Trying to James 1:2-4, but my flesh is telling me the opposite of that

The Lord gives and takes away, but with these losses I don’t know how to adapt

My flesh is telling me to xyz, you fill in the gap

The devil will show you the cheese but won’t show you the trap

God’s word allowed me to become more aware & my mind finally started to unwrap

The spirit tells me be still and know that God has you exactly where He wants you at

All grief is good grief, if you know where to find your relief

Cant stop feeling these unending pains

Just hoping my current events would somehow eventually change

One year and nine months later, I’m praising the Creator Thanking Him for this blessing He did major

Looking back at the trials, I wouldn’t change them, because they made this blessing so much more

Then ever before, new life new journey that we get to explore

His eyes open and he starts breathing, tears of joy we both start weeping

So delightful to know God created his innermost being, he’s fearfully and wonderfully made

It’s a sight worth seeing, rainbow baby has or faith exceeding

So Thankful for his arrival and the air he’s breathing


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